The Power of Half Measures

Eight months after my second child was born, I ventured into the world of cloth diapers. Yes, I'd given gDiapers a try, and they hadn't worked for me. Cloth seemed overwhelming, a vortex that inhaled time that I simply didn't have. With the insouciance of a second-time mom, I thought I'd give bonafide cloth diapering a try, so long as I had the "training wheels" of disposables in case of emergency. I was compelled to do this because of Maria Montessori. I think it's safe to say we have joined the cult of true-blue Montessori (read: The Absorbent Mind). We were fumbling idiots during my son's first few years, until we got him in an AMI-certified Montessori environment. Armed with more knowledge of the method now, we are doing our best to create the best environment possible for our daughter. She doesn't have a crib, she has a floor bed. We got rid of our changing table. She doesn't have flashing toys that make noise. And she loves it. Our son was potty-trained in approximately three weeks after being put in cloth underwear all day instead of a diaper. The theory is that human beings are naturally averse to having their urine and feces close to their bodies. Cloth makes walking around with soiled underpants uncomfortable, noticeable, and, therefore, provides a child motivation to anticipate when he or she needs to evacuate. Disposables, with their otherworldly absorbency, makes wetness less noticeable and even creates a kind of "sauna-effect" that can feel nice.

Anyway, I got my diapers at Green Mountain Diapers, and I couldn't recommend them more highly. They simplify the truly overwhelming process of choosing from among the insane amounts and types of cloth diapers and even include a handy how-to packet with their orders. They're honest about what seems to work and what doesn't, and they are completely nonjudgmental, which I love. For me, the word was simplicity. I didn't want the expensive cloth diapers-but-really-look-like-disposables, with their removable inserts and super cool diaper covers. I wanted those old fashioned prefolds and a basic diaper cover. I chose the organic unbleached cotton prefolds and the Bummis snap and velcro diaper covers (two, to start).

After two weeks of doing this, I'm not sure what's worse for the environment--disposables or cloth. Either way, it's clear that pooping babies take a hell of a toll on the environment, at least in this day and age. I had to wash my prefolds approximately seven times before they were absorbent enough to be used. Once they were ready, I began using them by folding them into rectangles and placing them in the diaper cover. My daughter's diaper was huge, but didn't seem to interfere with her crawling. One of the first things I noticed was how much more often my daughter was wet--or rather, how much easier it was for me to notice. Disposable diapers are meant to be uber-absorbent. It's the guiding principle of the diaper companies to wick away as much moisture as possible so, let's be frank here, parents don't have to change diapers so often. I kept a lined trashcan in the bathroom, in addition to our regular bin, where I tossed dirty cloth diapers. I kept a trash can in her nursery where I threw my chlorine-free diaper wipes (I didn't go whole hog and buy cloth wipes). When she pooped, I shook it out in the toilet and, most of the time, put it right in the diaper pail. There was one time that I had to soak it in the toilet. It's quite difficult to use the toilet to rinse off a poopy diaper when the toilet is low-flush. Some mothers get a hose, but I didn't want to do that. The potential of spray-back was too much for me.

I feel as if I were twenty pounds lighter, knowing that I have cut down on my use of disposables by about 80%. That's 80% fewer diapers in the landfill from my household, where the diapers will outlive my great-great-great grandchildren, and likely beyond. I also feel better about the material that is so close to my daughter's private area. It can't be wonderful for chlorine-soaked plastic to be so close to her body. I am thrilled that she is feeling what it's like to be wet, setting the stage for potty training. In their book, Montessori from the Start, the Lillard mother and daughter team mention that in the fifties, before the advent of disposable diapers, babies were potty trained, on average, at eighteen months. Today, kids are often in diapers well into their fifth year. My own son potty-trained at two-and-a-half. We think his sister will be trained sometime during what Montessori called the sensitive period, between 12-18 months.

Now. The cleaning. This is where things get confusing for me. And I haven't seen my first month's water bill, so I can't tell you yet how much more my bill might be. When I have a load of diapers, for me, one a day, I have to put them through a cold rinse in the washer (I add a tiny bit of detergent). Then I put them through a hot wash with a few drops of bleach for disinfecting. Then I put them through another cold rinse to be sure the detergent has been sufficiently rinsed out, to avoid irritating my daughter's skin. Then I have to dry them at least two cycles, since the heavy organic cloth takes a long time to try. I could dry them outside, but I'm often crunched and need to have the diapers (I bought twelve). I do this once a day. How much energy does this take? How much fossil fuel consumption? How much water? I don't know yet. I am in the process of finding out.

Let me say this. I am a convert to cloth. They're good for my daughter. They're good for the earth in terms of landfill pollution. The idea of putting something into the landfill that will not decompose for 250-500 years, not once, but over and over and over and over and over again, is repellent to me. Yet I did just that for my first child, and for the first eight months of my second child's life. In addition, diapers contain noxious chemicals, like traces of Dioxin, a carcinogen that is a byproduct of paper-bleaching. I am a cloth diaper mama, but I use the occasional disposable. Often at night. Sometimes when I travel. When she spends the day at Grandma's. So, in truth, I am engaging in a half-measure (well, maybe a three-quarter measure). I am cloth diapering the majority of the day while still utilizing a disposable every once in a while.

But here's the thing. I don't see this as a failure. I believe there is power in half-measures when it comes to an either/or situation like this, which isn't, in fact, either/or. If more people tried to do some cloth diapering, instead of feeling like they had to go whole hog and, as a result, rejected it out of hand, we could more realistically tackle the landfill/diaper situation. The problem is that much of the cloth diaper contingent makes a mom who might be on the fence feel as if she'd be a failure if she used the occasional diaper from time to time. I think we have a better chance of converting people if we say: "Hey, go half-sies to start! We'll take it!"